Don't tip the delivery boy

Lately I've had some encounters with some pretty down and out creatures. To start off a few weeks ago I walked to the store for some late night groceries and on the way came face to face with 2 sknunks who seemed to be fighting each other (or loving each other) either way I figured they might be about to go off if I was anywhere near, so I got the hell out of there. If that wasn't strange enough when I got home I noticed the next door neighbor cat sitting on my porch looking extremely interested at what was going on in the kitchen. I looked in the window to see a bat flying around the house. The bat catching story is a long one but lets just say that after 2 hours he was outside again.

Unrelated to that today I was eating some leftover pizza which had been ordered a few days earlier and had been in the fridge and three quarters into the second slice I noticed something strange. The slice had 2 separate clusters of little white things on it. It looked strange so I looked at the remaining slices to see if it was some kind of spice that had been put on the whole pizza but it only appeared on the slice I had in my hand. Upon closer inspection the clusters where little bunches of maggots. HOLY FUCKING SHIT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I guess when the pizza had been sitting out after it had been ordered a fly had laid some eggs on it. TOTAL FUCKING BULLSHIT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I'm a bit obsessive when it comes to food cleanliness and such so I hate shit like that, especially not knowing if I had actually eaten a bunch of them without knowing.

My Mom told me that in the native American world that when animals appear in your life they are there to teach you something and that each one symbolizes something that is supposed to be a lesson, well I looked up the skunk and the bat to find out what they were supposed to mean but I cant for the life of me find out what a fucking maggot teaches you when you (most likely) ingest it. WHAT THE FUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!

Fuck Mel Gibson

Seriously, as far as I'm concerned the guy can eat a garbage bag full of dicks. I'll admit that I was into the "Mad Max" movies, the "Lethal Weapon" flicks were decent (despite getting the tbs treatment is recent years), "conspiracy theory" was alright and I was even kinda a fan of Payback but when Gibson got on the whole "Passion of the Christ" thing it didn't really work for me. The whole thing just rubbed me the wrong way. The reports were that at the end of it all "The Passion of the Chirst" will have earned Gibson upwards of One Billion Dollars. Now I've always felt that if Gibson is truly a faithful man and truly just wanted to show the what happened to Jesus then he should donate every penny of profit from that film to charity and if not he should be confronted with some serious questions.

The guy is full of shit instead of making a film depicting all the good things that Jesus did he chose to ultimately make one about Jesus final hours of suffering and death. Hmmm I wonder why, could it be that that's what would sell and make him shitloads of money. Now I know that the crucifixion is an important part in the story of Jesus but if that's all you show the question is What are you trying to say with this film?

It would sort of be like if a film maker went up to the studio and said:
film maker: I want to make a movie about Elvis
studio: So do you want to portray Elvis' rise to fame and how he made music that many people loved and identified with?
film maker: Oh no not at all. I want to make a movie about Elvis' last hours when he was fucked up on pills and then show him dying on a toilet.

So the recent news about Gibson getting pulled over drunk and spouting anti-Semitic remarks further solidifies the case that the guy is full of shit. Being drunk is no excuse, you don't say things when you're drunk unless you actually believe them. I mean when I'm drunk I'm not going to start yelling I hate Nickelback If I really don't (I really do). So Gibson isn't going to be making anti-Semitic remarks when he's drunk unless he is in fact a anti-Semite. Now you may be asking "Hey wasn't Jesus Jewish? How can Mel Gibson be an anti-Semite?". If I can re-iterate a point: MEL GIBSON IS FULL OF SHIT. From what I've heard Jesus is a pretty forgiving guy and I guess you'd have to be if you're so called followers are shit bags like Gibson.

Conversation between Jesus and Mel Gibson I would like to see:
Jesus: So I saw that movie you made about me getting beaten tortured and then crucified
Gibson: What did you think?
Jesus: Too much whipping not enough leper healing I was hoping to maybe see some scenes where I helped people, you know loving people was really the message I was trying to get across.
Gibson: Well I made a lot of money with that movie. I even started selling official "passion of the Christ" crucifixion nails
Jesus: Do you remember when I found people selling things in the temple I was rather upset and I even tossed over the vendors tables. Have you ever even read the bible?
Gibson: Well ummm....
Jesus: Mel?
Gibson: I read some of it...
Jesus: And what did you learn from it?
Gibson: That is would make a big blockbuster movie